A mother of two who is about to get married to her fiancé’ expressed her concerns about living with her 12-year-old future stepson. The woman had her reasons but not everyone agreed with them.

Blending families can take a lot of work and patience, and one woman about to start a future with her husband and their children struggled with the idea.

The woman explained that she had two sons, one 10-year-old and one five-year-old, while her future husband had a 12-year-old son from his past relationship.

A mother and her sons | Source: Shutterstock

As they got closer to getting married, her future stepson asked if he could live with his father and new wife because he had always craved a genuine family dynamic since his parents never married.

The father fully supported the idea and believed it would help shape his son’s personal growth, but the wife-to-be still was not entirely sold.

Why Is the Mom Reluctant to Live With Her Stepson?

The woman was concerned for several reasons; firstly, she felt the 12-year-old boy did not like her youngest son. She said he hardly included him in any activities and seemed annoyed whenever she would ask him to accompany her son to the bathroom.

A concerned family | Source: Shutterstock

Secondly, the mother found her soon-to-be stepson very competitive. She felt he always tried to outdo her eldest son and got angry whenever he was better at something. Therefore, the mother reasoned that she wanted to raise her kids in a nurturing environment, not a competitive one.

Lastly, her biggest concern was the 12-year-old’s academic performance and behavior. Her Fiancé had told her that his son had struggled in school and been called out for his behavior, so she feared he would influence her sons negatively.

Two boys fighting over a scooter | Source: Shutterstock

However, his father did not think much of it and thought he would improve as he got older. The woman has expressed her reluctance to her fiancé, but he disagrees with her reasons. She also went to her mother, who also dismissed her concerns. So, the mother turned to Reddit users for advice.

What Was the Conclusion?

Although the woman thought she would find people who understood her perspective, she mostly received comments about how wrong she was not to want her future husband’s son to live with them.

A couple talking | Source: Shutterstock

People clarified that the son had every right to live under the same roof as his father. Regarding her concerns about the 12-year-old’s behavior, commenters said all she needed to do was have a conversation with her husband and work through the problems together.

She was also reminded that her sons could experience behavioral issues and that, as a mother, she would find ways to help them. Therefore, the same attention must be given to her stepson too.

After realizing how much her confession had triggered a few commenters, the woman returned with an update. She admitted that she did not present herself as the best person but clarified that she would not do anything to hurt her husband’s son.

A family at the beach | Source: Shutterstock

Reading through the comments, the soon-to-be wife realized she was more concerned about her children’s needs than her stepsons. As she now stepped into a marriage, she was aware that part of that future meant blending her family.

Therefore, she spoke to her fiancé and agreed to live with her future stepson. They plan on getting a bigger house and working towards getting custody of the 12-year-old boy.

Here is a story about a stepmother who secretly put a child up for adoption.