Most parents tend to feel embarrassed when their children misbehave in public, but sometimes, you encounter those who pay no attention to the antics of their toddlers at restaurants and other venues.

Such was the case when one couple visited a restaurant for dinner and brought their 4-year-old son along. Like most toddlers, the little boy was not content to sit still, and he got up to play around in the restaurant. When a waitress told the child to go back to his seat, the father was having none of it.

The father decided to air his frustration in a letter to Slate’s “Care and Feeding” advice column to get its take on the incident. Without giving his real name, he began by explaining that he and his wife had decided to take their son to a mid-tier restaurant that was neither a fast-food joint nor an upscale, fine-dining eatery.

He admitted that his son was the type of toddler who finds it hard to stay in his seat for a long period of time. Because of this, he and his wife allowed his son to roam.

“My son is a normal, active little boy, and it’s hard for him to sit through a whole dinner, so we let him explore the restaurant a little,” the father wrote.

However, he said his decision did not go unnoticed by a server at the restaurant.

“I noticed our waitress giving him the hairy eyeball, so we asked him to stop running. He was pretty good about it after that, but he did get underfoot when she was carrying a tray, and she spoke to him pretty sharply to go back to our table and sit down,” he continued.

This did not go down well with dad.

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The father took offense at the server’s actions, explaining that he felt the waitress had crossed the line.

“It was completely uncalled for, and she should have come and spoken to us personally instead of disciplining someone else’s child,” he wrote.

He then went on to state that he retaliated by only tipping the server five percent. He said he also complained about the server’s actions to the manager of the restaurant. However, the manager gave no indication that he would reprimand the waitress. He ended his letter by writing that while his wife agreed with him about the waitress overstepping her boundaries, others on Facebook had “judgy responses.”

Among the Facebook comments were from one user, who pointed out that children that age are capable of remaining seated throughout a meal, and their parents are usually at fault if the kid runs amok. Another comment stated that, in public, adults have to take responsibility for young children who could pose a danger to themselves or others, giving the example that a young child running free in a restaurant poses a danger to servers carrying hot and heavy dishes.

Another user pointed out that a child that is not capable of behaving well in public should not be brought to a nice restaurant where they can disrupt the dining experience of people who are paying for a good time at an above-average venue.

When reposted on Reddit, one user commented: “I completely agree with the answer given!! Restaurants are NOT play grounds! Parents of young children need to teach them proper manners as expected in our society. If children are too young to handle the location then the parents should NOT BRING THEM THERE.”

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Meanwhile, Slate’s advice columnist, Nicole Cliff, responded to the father’s letter by saying he was undoubtedly in the wrong on the issue.

“Yeah, this is your fault. It’s hugely your fault. Of course it’s hard for a 4-year-old to sit still, which is why people usually stick to fast-dining establishments while working on restaurant manners. It’s why one parent usually responds to a fidgety kid who wants to ‘explore’ by taking him outside the restaurant, where he can get his wiggles out while not taking laps around servers precariously carrying trays of (often extremely hot) food and drink,” Cliff wrote.

She advised the father to keep his son from upscale establishments until the child learned to behave.

“A kid ‘exploring’ a restaurant is not a thing. When you did intervene, it wasn’t to get him back in his seat. It was just to instruct him to ‘stop running.’ You weren’t parenting, so a server did it for you. She was right. You were wrong,” Cliff continued.

Cliff then advised the father to take full responsibility for his child as no one else can teach them to behave except his parents.

“Your son is not ready to eat at a “medium-nice” restaurant again until he is capable of behaving a little better. You can practice at home. You can practice at McDonald’s. You can try a real restaurant again with the understanding that one of you may need to take him out when he starts getting the urge to run an obstacle course,” she wrote.

Unable to keep her disdain hidden, Cliff had some final advice for the dad.

“I doubt that you will do this, but I encourage you to return the restaurant, apologize to the manager for complaining about your server, and leave her a proper tip.”

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Who do you think was wrong in this situation? The dad or the waitress? Let us know, and be sure to send this to friends and family to get their take on the incident.