There’s a reason Jack Nicholson hasn’t worked with Robert DeNiro in four decades. “Being on set with him is like eating shards of glass,” said Nicholson,” It’s like babysitting one of those dumb little dogs that live in your wife’s purse.”
DeNiro has been having a hard time getting work lately after his angry woke speeches of late became tiresome to the American people.
“It’s like watching one of your favorite superheroes flip to the dark side,” said Will Wheaton, “I can’t believe he went woke.”
The kid who played Brick on “The Middle” agrees: “I used to idolize him. Then I learned that I’m a better actor, and I love Trump. So that makes me better than him.”
DeNiro refused to comment on the story, but he did tell us that the whole idea is pretty silly. “I’ve seen you guys convince these idiots that Garth Brooks went broke and that Roseanne has a new show that’s kicking everyone’s butt in the ratings for a year now, so I’m not really surprised. That last speech got the cesspool fired up against me.”
By “cesspool” he means you and me, patriots. He thinks Americans respect people who stand up against tyranny in the interest of democracy but fails to understand that this is a constitutional republic, which means he’s wrong somehow.
How? It doesn’t matter how. God Bless America.
